Mistory and Martory squabble, ignoring both me and Nonna.

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「Err, though I don’t think I have any obligation, let me introduce you.
This here is the eldest daughter of the Leavat House, Martory……」

But the two stare at each other like we don’t exist.

「Wait, wait.
Isn’t this your first time meeting? Why are you so hostile?」

Their respective houses are on opposite factions, however I don’t believe the girls value their families so highly, besides they shouldn’t know one another’s background.」

「「She’s an enemy!」」

Nonna’s half-hearted introduction goes unheard.

「Alright, I’ve shown my courtesy.
Let’s leave them alone, Aegir-sama.」

I pat Nonna who jumps into my chest and rubs her cheek against me.
As if vying for attention, a fluffy object nuzzles my leg.
It’s the fox.

Sekrit is also clinging to me from behind with feather-like touches.
When I turn around, she lets out a hmph and swiftly separates.
What an unexpectedly cute side she displayed.

Meanwhile, Martory and Mistory are still facing off.

Is this the insidious name-calling which is characteristic of noble women……?

「Aren’t you a bit too skinny, chicken bones, skeleton.」

「Huh? You have a shiny forehead, ugly fatso.」

Their insults were more direct than I imagined.

「I can see how rough your skin is.
That’s a cheap necklace you have.
Country bumpkin potato girl.」

「Your makeup is as thick as a layer of earth and it stinks, old lady.」

Their faces get closer.
Such disputes are pretty common in the back alley.

「「You alcoholic! Rotten bitch! Troublesome woman!」」

Their voices overlap.

「They’re throwing boomerangs back and forth……」

Nonna gazes downward with a look of resignation and makes eye contact with the fox curling around my leg.

「Ah, such lovely fur……」

The fox gives a short yelp before scampering away, and is promptly chased by Nonna at an unbelievable speed.

「「Lonely spinster! Other women of the same age already have kids! ……so mean!!」」

A boomerang stabs into the weak point of both sides and they eventually begin to grapple.

「You shitty woman, I won’t forgive you!!」

「Are you going to hit me!? Try it, you wild monkey girl! Someone save me, I’m going to be killed!!」

Both of them shout and grab each other’s clothes.
Their dresses rip, exposing their breasts and ass, but neither of them care.

「Oh, my hand slipped.」

Sekrit deliberately rolls an easy-to-hold stick and a palm-sized rock to the fighting duo.

「Don’t make things worse.」

I slap Sekrit’s ass lightly and wedge myself in between the two women.

「Enough.
Your clothes are getting all messed up!」

「「But that woman is-!!」」

I nod to acknowledge their complaints while putting a hand on my pants.

Mistry and Martory have a hard time listening to anybody when they’re excited even when I’m one-on-one with them, so I don’t think I’ll be able to talk to them together.
In that case, I have to take my dick out and calm them down first.

「You calm down too.」

Sekrit forcefully pulls my lowered pants back up.
Hey, you got it caught on the metal fixtures.
That hurts.

「What’s the commotion? Don’t tell me, are there thieves that barged in!?」

Cedric, Martory’s younger brother, rushes out in his nightclothes after hearing the noise.

「Apologies for the sudden intrusion! I received news that a person of my household has come here……」

Pushing aside the guards and opening the entrance is Mistry’s younger brother, Reval.
You’re supposed to be a high-ranking noble, yet you just burst in.

The eyes of the two newcomers first land on me as I am curled up and holding my groin in pain, then widen when they see their flesh and blood tussling with each other, then lastly they narrow when they spot the other noble.

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「You’re that lazy son from the Schmidt family!」
「You’re the cheeky bumpkin of House Leavat!」

It seems the both of them expressed their true feelings due to the abruptness of the situation.

「「Sister!!」」

When they realize that their sisters are clawing at each other and their clothes are torn, the look in their eyes changes.

Not good.
They regard their sister as a precious family member and also as a woman they yearn for.

If I put myself in their position and see Nonna’s clothes ripped apart or Celia’s body scratched, what would I do?

「You’d probably snap and dismember whoever did it.」

「No, the one who did it this time would be a woman.
I guess I’d just penetrate her.」

Cedric and Reval spring into action after Sekrit speaks to me like I’m a rape fiend.

「What are you doing to my sister, mountain monkey!!?」

Reval draws his sword and swings at Martory.

「Don’t lay a hand on my sister, you brute!!」

Cedric blocks the slash with his short sword.
Sparks fly and the blade of Reval slides off the tip, grazing Cedric’s cheek.

「Is that it!!?」

Cedric isn’t out of the fight yet.
He twists his short sword to escape from the clash, throws it straight at Reval’s torso in the same breath, and sends him flying with a front kick in the opening created by the hasty backstep.

Reval doesn’t simply let himself get knocked away.
As he is falling, he sweeps Cedric’s leg, tripping him, and in that brief gap takes Mistry by the hand and protects her back with his body.

Cedric also shields Martory in his fall, covering the holes in her clothes with his sleepwear.

「Nee-sama, are you hurt!?」

「Nee-chan, did she do anything cruel to you!?」

Both of them revert to addressing their sister like they did during their younger days.

The two women froze up when the serious fight happened before their eyes, whereas the two men’s eyes grew increasingly bloodshot.

Guards of the mansion and guards policing outside come running in, but they are unsure whether to point their swords at the two nobles or not.
Cedric is my guest and Reval has likely stated his name, proving it by showing his family crest.

「It’s your turn.」

「I know.」

I wrap the cloth given to me by Sekrit around the palm of my hand.
Wait, this is someone’s black underwear, and it’s slimy with juice.

The two of them charge at each other, yelling.
I jump in between them faster than they could collide.

「Hmph, what can you do with a dagger in your pajamas!? I will turn you into the rust on my noble swo-――uwaaaah!!」

「I can’t think about myself now that it’s come to this.
I’ll finish you off righ-―― uooooh!!」

I block Reval’s sword bare-handed, grab him by the collar and throw him aside.
Reval skids on the floor and the momentum carries him into a wall, where he crashes and faints.

As for Cedric, I seize the arm holding the short sword and toss him upward.
The large-bodied Cedric spins in the air like a boulder flung by a catapult, bumps against the ceiling and falls head-first.
Of course, he’ll die if he lands so I catch him by his foot at the last second.

Silence fills the room after the two parties involved were incapacitated in an instant.

「You guys, whose mansion are you in right now?」

I pause slightly to let my words sink in.

Cedric’s back straightens and Reval tenses up.

I exhale and breathe in deeply before letting out a voice filled with bloodlust.

「What’s your answer?」

「I-it’s Margrave Hardlett’s mansion!」

Cedric replies.

I nod slowly as if holding something back.
In actuality, I am enduring the urge to pee after walking in cold weather, but I hide it by acting.

「Knowing that, you still drew your sword? If you aren’t a total moron…… are you underestimating me!!?」

My shout is followed by a shockwave that reverberates throughout the mansion.
The chandelier sways, the light of candles are blown out, and the harpy outside the window falls down.

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「T-that’s not it.」

When I face Reval, who objects, he takes two steps back and drops on his butt.
Further strengthening my bloodlust causes him to tremble.
Well, this is the result of not being in enough life-or-death battles.

「Split up and find an inn in opposite directions.
I won’t forgive you if this happens again.」

I turn my back and wave my hand, telling them to leave.
Neither Cedric or Reval say anything and they scurry out of the mansion.

「Now then.」

I approach Martory and Mistry, who are both completely still from the sword fight and my bellow.

「「Hiiih.」」

They are hugging each other and shaking as if they forgot about their earlier scuffle.
Was it that scary? I better patch things up.

I lightly tug on Martory’s nose with my fingers and poke Mistry in the forehead.

「That will do for your punishment.
Don’t fight anymore.」

They smile with all their heart at me, an exact opposite reaction to the previous situation, and embrace one another.
As their eyes meet in each other’s arms, their faces turn red.

「「S-so kind!」」

Both of them squeeze my hand tightly.
When their hands coincidentally touch, they glare sharply again.

「Geez……」

I screwed up a few times, but it seems we can get back on track with the original goal.
The last few days spent going around to all my acquaintances in the city won’t be a waste.

I fiercely embraced the two I brought to my room.

Flesh bounces, juices scatter, and moans intersect.

I lay on their bodies or put them on top of me while I pound them with my dick and my words.

As they writhe in agony under my intense attack, the two recite what I tell them.

「I-I won’t hurt myself again!! I-I swear!!」

「I won’t hit or scratch anyone again!! So please! Give me more!!」

The two sweaty female bodies pile on each other and squirm in pleasure.

「I won’t say any bad words!! Please stick it inside me!!」

「I won’t anger Nonna-san!! Put it in me first!!」

My dick pulses and semen shoots out.

Mistry arches her thin body and foams at the mouth, whereas Martory curls up and squeals.

「Uuu……so good……I’ll eat lots and add meat to my body……」

「Aah……my hips are moving on their own…… I’ll limit alcohol to one bottle a day……」

I instill some more thoughts on them during postcoital activity.

「If I cheat…… I will……confess……right away……」

「We will get along……always.」

Once they have agreed upon my instructions, I have them kiss each other as proof of their reconciliation.

「Wonderful.
Let me give you a present.」

I retrieve two sets of piercings from the drawer of my desk.

「I’d like you to wear it when you are attracted to me.」

Immediately, the two who are stretching and enjoying the lingering feeling of their orgasms get up and snatch the piercings from me.

I initially thought about giving them a ring, but the significance of a ring to an unmarried woman is too much and my “acquaintances” also advised……engraving something in their bodies or opening a hole for a piercing is better.

「I put it on!!」

「Hey.」

Mistry attaches the piercings without any hesitation to her nipples.
Why does she have piercings done on her nipples already?

That shock was quickly erased by the other noble lady.

「They’re on!」

「Heeey.」

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Martory attaches the piercing to an even more questionable place, a part of the flesh sticking out around her genitals.

「I cried for a week when this piercing was done……but fufu, I’m glad I did it.」

「Kuuuh!」

Mistry scrunches up her face in frustration and reverses the pointed end of a comb toward her.
She must be thinking of using that to open a new hole.
Obviously, that’s not a good idea.

「……will this count as self-harm?」

「it will.」

She vexingly gives up when I outright confirm her question and then glares at Martory.

「Get along.」

「Uuugh……meanie.」

Her voice sounded resentful but also a little cute.

「It’s about time you return to your brother.
But keep your relationship with me secret.」

It would be problematic in a lot of ways if that sis-con finds out.

They listen obediently and display their friendliness to me again with another kiss before exiting the room.

「It’s perfect.
Things went frighteningly well.」

I have to thank my “acquaintances” properly later.

Woah, my bladder is about to burst.
It’ll look uncool if I tail them, let’s go to the toilet.

When I arrive in the corridor, I see the two of them mumbling with their heads down and walking slowly.
Then at the exact same timing, they wipe their mouths and spit on the ground.

「Having to get along with this shitty woman makes me sick.
Can I use financial support to outwit him? But Hardlett-sama doesn’t seem to want money or works of art…… what do I give him…… information? What if I ask my brother……?」

「How do I kick down this savage woman? ……if I’m going to give him something, it’ll have to be a woman’s body perhaps…… I’m the one with a prettier face, so if I eat and put on some weight, then I need something else…… a conflict between factions…… I need to go to Reval……」

Let’s pretend I didn’t hear anything and go take a piss.

「The right! To the right! The fur went that way! Fugya ーーit’s coldーー!!」

「Aah! Madam fell in the pond!」

「It’s only waist-deep, so you’re fine.
Don’t flail around, you’re flinging water everywhere!」

The fox hops back on my shoulder.
Is Nonna alright? I heard a rather big sneeze, but I’m sure she’s fine.

I suddenly feel bloodlust coming from behind me.
Normally I would turn around in a flash, but I’m one step slower because I’m in the middle of peeing.
That was fatal.

(O sworn enemy, divine punishment――!!)

Descending with a demon-like appearance is Casie, who should have flown in on the wind.
She has a silver candlestick in her hand.

「At least wait till I’m done here.」

(I won’t have it! Take thiiis!!)

The candlestick plunges into my ass.

「――――why is everyone shoving objects into my ass!!?」

「Master, what was that scream―― ah-」

A maid in her thirties discovers me on the floor of the bathroom.
The problem is that she can’t see Casie.

If she could see Casie, she would know that Casie is the one twisting the candlestick into my ass.
As it stands, her only logical conclusion would be that I’m pleasuring myself by ramming a candlestick up my ass.

「Pardon me.」

Don’t look at me like I’m a pervert.
If Casie is also doing it now, Sekrit will do it too, in a sexual context.
What’s more, she’ll use objects with complicated shapes and I won’t be able to pull it out.

Zwei Elfie.

Gido, Visitacion, and Zaphnes arrive at the collapsed fort as originally planned.

「Looks like someone beat us to it.」

Gido mutters in an unamused tone.
He is armed with a long one-handed sword and a short bow strapped to his back, with generally thicker leather armor all over his body.

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「It’s because he was so loud.」

Visitacion huffs in disgust.
She is armed with a crooked short sword and multiple straight-edged daggers slotted on her waist, but otherwise appears to be dressed in plain clothes, hiding the fact she actually has plenty of hidden weapons on her body.

「Fufufu, I guess that’s what happens when I publicly declare the prospect of making a huge profit.」

Zaphnes boldly accepts the cold gazes of the other two.
He is wielding a two-handed sword, a greatshield, but also has a spear slung around his shoulder, and is donning a set of heavy-duty plate armor.

Adventurer parties consisting of dozens of people have come to their place of designation before they have and are entering the ruins successively.

「……you’re not going to tell us to assault them from behind, right?」

Zaphnes guffaws at Gido’s question and drops himself down on the ground with a plunk.

「I’m not going to say anything pretty…… like it is prohibited for adventurers to kill each other, but we aren’t going to do something so bothersome.
More importantly, I brought some first class meat.
Let’s start a fire and cook it in a pot.
We need to fill our stomachs before a big job.」

「They’re going to loot the place until it’s empty……not that it matters to me or anything.」

Gido sits opposite to Zaphnes.

「Same here.
I only came because you forced me to.」

Visitacion ignores Zaphnes when he pats the space next to him and chooses to sit beside Gido instead.

The trio surround the pot for a good two hours before Zaphnes stands up.

「Shall we go now?」

The corners of Zaphnes’s mouth raises slightly as he takes one look at the entrance the other adventurers had gone in, then he invades the fort through another opening.

After progressing about 15 minutes of the tilted and broken interior which has the worst footing, the preceding group can be seen.

「Guard my right and my ass.」

Zaphnes says as such and checks on the preceding group…… or more precisely, the corpses of the preceding group.

「One, two, three……they’re all dead.
Since their innards haven’t been sucked up, I can assume this isn’t the doing of surviving insects.
With that said, although they are amateurs, this bunch at least has a decent amount of physical strength.
Killing them all in such a short time means that we’re not dealing with very many opponents.」

Gido and Visitacion are more than a little surprised.
That’s because they thought Zaphnes was just an arrogant man whose bark is worse than his bite.

「Were they all used as test subjects……no, I guess sacrificial stones?」

Zaphnes grins.

「This one was hacked to pieces, this one was cleaved in two from the top of his head, meanwhile this one has no visible external wound yet has turned pale and died…… do you get it?」

Visitacion, with an evidently increased level of alertness beside the confused Gido, answers.

「Undead, and not just zombies or skeletons, it’s a high-ranking type.」

「Correct.
As expected of the woman I set my eyes on.」

At that moment, a dark haunting voice calls from behind all of them, sending chills through their bodies.

Zaphnes takes out a large bottle from his breast pocket and first pours the contents over himself.

「It’s holy water.
The price will be deducted from the reward.」

Zaphnes proceeds to also apply the water to Gido and Visitacion.

Simultaneously, a giant translucent shadow appears at the end of the pathway with an eerie shriek.

Protagonist: Aegir Hardlett.
25 years old.
Winter.
Status: Goldonia Kingdom Margrave.
Great Feudal Lord of Eastern Area.
Mountain Legend.
Friend of the Dwarves.
Friend of the King of Aless.
Dragon Slayer Hero.
Elf Mediator.
Sex King of White City.
Mad Demon God.
Poison Resistance (strong).
Counselor (temporary).

Appears in the present story:
Nonna (fallen in water), Reval (really loves his sister), Cedric (sisterly love)
Martory (getting along?), Mistry (getting along?), Sekrit (a little jealous), Casie (twisting)
Gido (encounter), Visitacion (encounter), Zaphnes (true charismatic adventurer)

Territory Population
Total: 365 000
Rafen: 47 000, Lintbloom: 8 000
Richemott (former Libatis): 34 000, Zwei Elfie: 2900 (+ 200)

Army
Personnel: Infantry: 1000, Cavalry: 500, Escort: 30
Armaments: Cannons: 30, Large Cannons: 15, Dwarven Cannons: 15, Field Artillery: 10, Chariots: 30

Assets: -270 000 gold (gold ore medium +11 000)
Sexual Partners: 816
Children who have been born: 71 + 567 (++)
Current Location: Rafen

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